Lucy’s* Story

Supporting a parent with dementia is tough but for Lucy*, the shock of discovering ten years ago that her father had dementia has now been compounded by her mother’s failing mental health. Sadly, as is often the case, a fall led to both her parents’ conditions worsening.

“Dad had a fall which meant he ended up in hospital and it seemed to be the tipping point for his dementia,” said Lucy. “Initially, he was cared for at home but his vascular dementia ultimately led to a series of further falls.

“Last year we had to take the very difficult decision to move him into a care home because it was becoming too much of a risk for him to stay at home.”

Just months after, in February 2023, Lucy’s Mum also suffered a fall.

Lucy explained: “Mum doesn’t tend to make a fuss and unbeknown to us, she was walking around despite having cracked her pelvis in four places. She did eventually agree to go into hospital but unfortunately, the damage to her pelvis has left her with continence problems.

“Just like with Dad, the fall also seemed to bring on symptoms of dementia. Although she has yet to be officially diagnosed, we are seeing all the same symptoms and traits that Dad displayed.”

With help from Nexus Care, Lucy is determined to enable her mum to live independently at home for as long as possible.

“She had always been fiercely independent and despite being 86, was driving right up until the time she had her fall,” said Lucy. “Thanks to the carers from Nexus, she is still able to enjoy a good quality of life.

“We have carers go in each morning to help her get dressed. Initially, this was just for half an hour but we have recently increased the care she receives.

“Her regular carers, Sam and Rachel, are brilliant and do whatever is needed, from personal care to just chatting with her and providing a little bit of company.

“They are also happy to take her out once in a while and she chooses where she fancies going. She loves spending time at a local garden centre or visiting M&S for a coffee.”

“When Dad was being cared for, Mum absolutely hated having carers in her home and wasn’t very accepting so we did fear the worst when we knew she would need help.

“However, to our complete surprise, her attitude has softened and she has become really quite fond of Rachel and Sam which I think speaks volumes!”

*Names have been changed to protect our clients’ identities